I Write TV Shows, Musicals & Movies
Equal parts rom-com, revolution, and real life.
My voice as a writer is “deranged Disney princess meets liberated woman.” Who needs fairytales when truth is stranger than fiction?
MY SCREENWRITING CAREER…
I’m a WGA Guild screenwriter and my voice is best described as deranged Disney princess meets liberated woman. I’m like if Drew Barrymore and Larry David had a secret love child. But, sadly, I’m not a nepo baby (or I’d be famous by now). Watch the video below to learn more about my voice as a writer.
I currently have a comedy feature starring Leslie Jones that’s also going to be Jone’s directorial debut. Additionally, I’ve had a movie optioned by Village Roadshow Entertainment, developed an original rom com with Andy Fleming, Mike Medavoy and Phoenix Pictures, a TV series with Jeff Garlin and creators of Curb Your Enthusiasm, a TV pilot with Nicolas Cage and an original TV series with Good Karma Productions led by Kunal Nayyar. I also have a movie based on the Hasbro board game Candyland with Kim Eva Mutuka (currently seeking producing partners and financing). While I’ve got a plethora of original projects in the works, my dream right now would be to be hired in a writer’s room with other like-minded souls.
I’m deeply intuitive and also work as an energy healer and psychic channel. My ability to feel everything, though overwhelming at times, is also my super power. In other words, yes, I talk to dead people, and yes, I’ve remembered all my past lives through past life regression. My intuition allows me to tap into the emotions of the characters I write. Between all the spirit guides in my energy field and the characters in my head, it’s just a raging party over here. But in all seriousness, I believe intuitive women are the most powerful beings on this planet. I’m here to fuck shit up and I don’t intend to do so quietly.
Speaking of intuitive women, yes it’s true I once met Nicolas Cage on Craigslist and wrote a TV pilot with him, only for it to end with him accusing me of opening a portal to dark magic. Apparently, the priestess character I wrote was too similar to his actual priestess in New Orleans? A female character arc, witchcraft! (Welcome to Hollyweird.) But I’m an alchemist. So I turned all my trauma into gold by channeling it into MY BIG BREAK (DOWN), the opening number for my Broadway musical, which tells the full the unfiltered story about meeting Nicolas Cage on Craigslist (via an unsolicited blind date). This song also talks about the comedian who really “Curbed my Enthusiasm” when he whipped out his dick (it wasn’t Larry). My mission is to burn the patriarchy down the way the God Lord intended: one musical theater number at a time. Alerting the girls, the gays and good men first because only people with a conscience are going to see Wicked For Good.
My musical Butterflies tonally is Wicked meets Fleabag with a story arc like Ever After. It’s a modern Cinderella story except it’s entirely true based on my life because we don’t need fairytales when reality is stranger than fiction. Also I wrote Dolly Parton as the fairy-god-mother character because my spirit guides told me she’s meant to do this with me…so if anyone knows Dolly help a bitch out 🪄✨. Butterflies is really about a woman’s ability to metamorphose no matter what kind of hell she’s been through and how only in facing her darkness is she truly able to get her wings🦋✨.
Nick Cage wasn’t my first time on Craigslist. I have insane stories about all the crazy things I've done to get my foot, or mermaid flipper in the door—flipper reference in relation to the fact that I worked multiple Craigslist kid's birthday parties dressed as Ariel because I’ve been that desperate for money despite having deals with the BIG SHOTS. Here’s a wild idea: maybe I should have been paid for my work?
The show I was writing with Nicolas Cage was about past lives and he was convinced we’d had one together. At the time, I thought he was nuts. Now, I’m writing my own TV show about my own past lives— and that fateful Craigslist meeting. It’s called A Tail as Old as Time and tonally its Crazy Ex-Girlfriend meets Hacks meets Avatar. It’s like a dark retelling of The Little Mermaid. According to past life regressions, this isn’t my first time in Hollywood, with Nicolas Cage, or even with a fucking mermaid tail on (ever heard of Lemuria or Atlantis?).
Overall, I write“fish-out-of-water”(or mermaid-out-of-water) stories about women and the misunderstood misfits of the world coming into their power and realizing their true potential. All the stories I write have some sort of element of profound healing, but they’re usually lensed through bush jokes and those relatable, albeit uncomfortable, human moments. I find the magic in the grounded and the supernatural in the super natural. I’m here to uplift, heal, and bring love to people through the stories I tell. It’s the heart of a simple, feel-good ’90s rom-com, or the catharsis of a high-concept buddy comedy, but told in a way that allows people to reach a deeper healing within themselves. Sometimes, the only way to move through and understand some of our deepest pain is by watching characters — who remind us of ourselves — transmute that same pain into joy on the screen. But let’s also laugh our asses off while we do it. After all, life is fleeting — let’s make it fun. My writing is equal parts rom com, revolution, and real life.
If you want to read any of my scripts, or are interested in hiring me in a writer’s room, or on a WGA scale assignment please email me at Kendall.milton@gmail.com!
